In Search of Home...

"the dark things i scribble"

Looking for peace in the chaos...

Listen up Allah, I trust u...

Hoping this will pass too...

I know I need to be strong.. help me when my shoulders fall weak.. 

help me because I'm down tonight.. 

I'm helpless tonight..

I know I make my ways to those who cause me pain..

help me to be wiser..

I'd rather get hurt than inflicting it..

I could let it go.. but you know all ..

My muscles every inch tears up n hurts reach their peak as the past wounds open sore..

Where is the calm?

All I get is pain

I don't know right now how to get there, how to reach it.

Which bus do I take, which train do I catch?

I try to fly the plane everyday to take me to that place..

but can't seem to get rid of the feeling...
I carry it everywhere I go

trying to make sense of it all

I can't get through to you

What you ask of me tell me...

Help me to be fearless from the shadows I leave behind..

Still searching for that place called home.. 

"Lost" is my new home..

tears have dried.. I try to move on..

Do not stop me from expressing tonight..

Sorry for my words, Love much now and I learned to forgive...

but I'm still not all the way because I'm frozen

My own they pretend to hold me but break me..

Still looking for that inner peace I lost quite a while back in the noise...

Can't hear my own screams no more...

Only watch myself helplessly disappear... 

Watch my spirit... 
My inner fire diminish...
I'm losing myself to the dark, to the noise, to the chaos... 

Save me Allah, save me I might wash away in the flood

I don't want to be that strong

Oh angels of mine... bring me, take me, port me home.

I feel like air...

There is no love...

I've changed myself, I've transformed.

This day is the longest day.
I might need a side to lay on tonight or someone to follow me in the deep...
All the liberty they take, love that they abuse
I feel nothing when I cry.
I hear nothing, No... I see no need to reply..
Come here so you can see me walk away tonight.